Love

<body topmargin=0 leftmargin=0 marginheight=0 marginwidth=0> <table cellpadding=0 cellspacing=0 border=0 height="100%"><tr> <td valign="top" width=200 BGCOLOR="#99FFFF" TEXT="#F7F7FF"> <bR> </td> <td valign="top" width="100%" BGCOLOR="#33CCFF" TEXT="#080000"> <div> <B>Love</B></div> <bR> <bR> <div> <A HREF="id17.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Contact Me">Contact Me</A>   |   <A HREF="glubs.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Glubs">Glubs</A>   |   <A HREF="ethology.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Ethology">Ethology</A>   |   <A HREF="shapes.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Shapes">Shapes</A>   |   <A HREF="foreword.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Foreword">Foreword</A>   |   <A HREF="bye_bye_my_lovely.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Bye Bye my Lovely">Bye Bye my Lovely</A>   |   <A HREF="hpm.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="H.P.M.">H.P.M.</A>   |   <A HREF="black_hole.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Black Hole">Black Hole</A>   |   <A HREF="boss.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Boss">Boss</A>   |   <A HREF="gray_or_grey.htm" TARGET="_top" 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  <A HREF="navigation.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Navigation">Navigation</A></div> <bR> <div> <B>Paris, March 29th, some rain.</B></div> <bR> <div> <TABLE BORDER="0" CELLPADDING="2" CELLSPACING="1" WIDTH="377" BORDERCOLORLIGHT="#C0C0C0" BORDERCOLORDARK="#808080" FRAME="BOX" RULES="ALL" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0" > <tR> <tD VALIGN=TOP BGCOLOR=#FFFF99 HEIGHT= 208 WIDTH="371"><div> <B>Any normal reader would say this is total filth.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Really disgusting, how can they allow old senile men to write such filth?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Indeed, totally filthy.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>So, how can we explain the efforts made my Humans to indulge into encounters which are both disgusting and dangerous if they are not programmed to do it?</B></div> <div> <B> </B></div> </tD> </tR> </TABLE></div> <bR> <bR> <div> <B>Good Morning World Viewers!</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>And welcome to all of you who have gathered to watch the first docking of two space vessels.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>We are connected to the National Science Association who shall be guiding the US satellite and at the same time to its equivalent in France, the National Wine Growers Association.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>I am at present directly connected with Donky Dunk who is watching the operations from the US Control Centre.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Hello, Donky, do you hear us?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Hello Ed, I copy you five on five.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>It is a great honour for us to be the first one in the World to report on the docking of a True Milk Made national Flag Docking Station with a Hunter Missile made in France. Incidentally Ed, the wasp shaped bottle I am holding in my left hand is a brown delicious bubbly stimulating and refreshing brown drink guarantied to be made one hundred per cent with genuine products.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Hello Donky, I am glad that we share the same liking for true national products, I never forget myself to drink at least one bottle before starting a new programme, really Donky, you will agree with me that the wasp shaped bottled brown bubbly drink makes you proud to belong to the country that invented it.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Well Donky, I am glad that we are on an advertisement free channel as we can now proceed without any interruptions with our programme. I just want to remind our special viewers that it took 2 days last time for the money to arrive into my account.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Well Donky, let us see if we are also connected to our French friends?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Hello Jacques, do you copy me?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>What do you mean Ed, you already want copy-rights, we agreed before the sending that we would share fifty-fifty, why are you taking up this subject now Ed, incidentally I also want my share on the wasp shaped bubble contract even if I have no idea of what you are talking about, some kind of brown Champagne, must be disgusting!</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Sorry Jacques, I know you are fluent in American, I just meant to ask you if you hear me properly and of course we are here on your terms, total cooperation, we give, you take, total fair deal.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Ca va Ed, sorry pour le misunderstanding. </B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Well Jacques how is the mission proceeding on your side of the Atlantic?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Ed, I just want to say, before we go in the scientific world that I must warn all our listeners against the use of counterfeited products claiming to be wine while the name wine is strictly reserved to products made in France. </B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Jacques, that was a most understandable statement which we all appreciate, how is the mission proceeding on your side?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Well Ed, while I do not want to waste time, I want to warn our listener against the use of these red products they claim to be wine, only French products are guarantied to contain 62% of French made sun and 56% of French rain and 32% of French made pesticides and 23% of sugar made from French Sugar beet sugar. We are the only producers in the World who can offer you total trust.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Well, Jacques, as you know, we wanted really to see how the experiment was proceeding on your side, so let us put aside these very interesting subjects.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Well Ed, let me toast to the project of the satellite docking, a toast of French Pure Red Wine in a French Glass held by a firm French Hand.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Ed, the French missile, which we like to call Baguette, well this is French fun, you would not understand it, is on course towards the Champs-Elysées where the docking will take place. Presently the French missile is in a Bar having a control of its fuel level, and I believe that the technicians are telling me that due to some vibrations felt in the knees the French missile has had to be lubricated with some French Made Cognac.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Hello Donky, what is the situation at the National Science Association?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Thank you Ed, here all monitors are active, we are following the track of our missile which we call “J-ello” sorry, you would not understand that over there, would you Jacques?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Donky, you would be surprised by the number of things we do understand over it when it come to this kind of science, I have you missile on my screen, at first why I would say that this is a 97-55-95 model, one of the best one if I may express my opinion.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>How right you are dear Jacques, did you also notice the enhanced forms we have given to the back side of this model?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Yes Donky, I think you have surpassed yourselves when designing this missile. Incidentally Donky I am looking at my monitor, I am sorry to note that your assistants have not told you that if you lean forward you will see a big stain on your blouse;</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>That was good Donky, you did not see any stain?, must have been some kind of reflection on my screen. I would say that you are a 92 D from what I can see from over here?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Jacques and Donky, this is Ed, I think that while our viewers have expressed their contentment at the profusion of technical details given by our specialists, I think it is time to follow closely the Docking procedure which is now going to take place for the first time between our best “J-ello” Station and that “Baguette” Missile;</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Jacques and Donky, from my control screen I can see that that our mobile station is now properly on course on the Champs-Elysées, our Proud Technicians at the Control Station are overjoyed by the success of that very delicate first stage, but some worry is creeping in as we still have no trace of the Hunter Missile?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Ed, this is Jacques, have no worry, it so happened that the Hunter “Baguette” Missile was being distracted by a Lure and was apparently under the impression that his assignment was to introduce this Far East Research Station to the Amusements offered by the Gay Paris. We immediately started the sub-routine called “I do not understand these people who eat rice all the day” and the “Baguette” Missile has left its docking tentative and has gone into Hunting Mode. </B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Ed, this is Donky, we have a Red alert on the “J-ello” docking Station, it is going off course, it seems to be strongly attracted by the Street Montaigne where all the Great Fashion designers have their shops;  J-ello appears to have totally lost the connection with our Base Team, all the detectors of J-ello are now oriented towards Fashion and Jewel shops, we are desperately trying to over-ride this Virus sub-Programme with which we have had such problems in the past;</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Oh, is the situation that desperate, Ed, I have here the Chief of the Control Team, he is very tense but at the same time you get that feeling of strength emanating from him.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Yes, Chief, can you repeat what you just told me?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Good Day, International Viewers, have no fear, I am in control, just let them come with all the distractions they want, I know that I am right about the Purpose and Design of my J-ello Station, nothing is going to distract it from it's duty. </B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Yes, Ed, you want to know why I feel so confident.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Ed, you see this button? No, you idiot, not that one, this one, don't you see what is written on it, scrub the UN? Yes that one, the one with the Stars on it. Now you understand why I feel so confident? Old Mate Rummy, start the national Anthem Programme, yes NOW!!!</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>See, Ed, why I never worried?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>See how our Docking station is now looking at this Fashion and Jewels displays with utter disgust. See that look in her eyes, yes, Ed, thanks to our Most Powerful Sub-routine, National Anthem, all values have been reset,  see that look in J-ello, no doubts about it Ed,  that Docking Station now has only one aim, getting a refuelling of True Home Made Texan Style Barbecue.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Chief, I think I am speaking for the Nation when I ask you to convey the gratitude of all viewers for a Brilliant Team that was able to devise such powerful Sub-routines.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Indeed, viewers, Ed, Jacques, J-ello has now aimed itself at the True Home Made Barbecue Center;</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Donky, Jacques, where are we with the Hunt and Mate Baguette Missile?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Ed, this is Jacques, we seem to have a problem with Baguette; he has tracked down J-ello but is standing in front of the True Home Made Authentic National Pride Pure Barbecue Centre and his sensors appear to have been obstructed and he looks bewildered, I would even say afraid.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Technicians are running around trying to find a solution to this unexpected problem, we did not realize that the National Anthem Sub-Programme would induce collateral damages in the very unstable Programs of Baguette.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Ed, Donky, apparently, one of our Genius Kid technicians has already devised a Program that will counter the damages provoked by the National Anthem routine; he says that he takes no pride for this program, that in fact it is a very old and tried program that has already worked in the past.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Yes, Young Genius, what is this Program?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>What do you mean, it is a sound?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Should I listen to it?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Am I running any risk by listening to this Program?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>No, you mean that I have been myself inoculated a long time ago and that it will just give me a big feeling of pleasure and gratification? Well, everything for Science and Progress let us listen to this Music Program;</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Oh that is really nice, can you hear the Program Donky and Ed?, can you hear the music of dollar bills falling into the pockets, of Euro Exchange rate getting Higher and Higher, oh, this is really marvellous, Baguette is now sniffing in the air, we can see that his detectors are all working again, of this is wonderful Ed and Donky, I wish you were hear to witness this, Baguette has now entered into the High Danger Zone of the True Home Made Genuine Authentic Texan Barbecue as if he does not have any fear of destruction, oh yes, this is wonderful, he is setting course directly on J-ello, apparently the programmed recognition signals are being exchanged, viewers, let us all listen to the first contact between Baguette and J-ello:</B></div> <bR> <div> <B><< My dear Lady, please accept my apologies, I am sorry if my recognition signals are not yet fully optimized in your Programming language, I am really sorry to intrude on you, but I thought that it would be most unfair if I did not draw your attention to the fact that you have made a Barbecue Stain, where, oh, just lean forward and you will see it, may I hold your arm while you are leaning forward, it is so slippery here, yes do you see it?, no, that strange, I have such a clear view, would you mind very much if I use my Cognac wetted Dior Handkerchief to gently rub you on these sensitive spots and remove those stains, you will feel so much more confident afterwards>></B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Ed, Donky, the first part of the Docking Program seems top be running exactly as planned, yet, please wait,  I have a worry, the J-ello Docking Station appears to be reluctant to proceed.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Ed, Jacques, I have here the Old mate Rummy, he tells us not to worry, that part was always foreseen as a possibility. He says that it was understood from the beginning that that the J-ello and Baguette Modules had incompatibilities but that a program was designed to overcome these encounters problems.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Ed, Jacques, apparently there is a problem, it is not quite clear whether the Baguette belongs to the Old Europe model or belongs to the Open Access Europe Model; Old Mate rummy says that if he runs the wrong program, everything could explode and Old Mate Rummy is asking us to take cover while He will stand on the bridge directing this very delicate Procedure.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>We are all watching while Old Mate Rummy is handling the situation. Do you realize Ed and Jacques that Old Mate Rummy has now been standing on the Bridge, for ten hours without once sitting down or resting?  I can now seen that Emergency Ships are approaching Baguette and J-ello, oh you should be here to see what fantastic procedure Old Mate Rummy had devised, Baguette is now fitted with a Baseball cap and his moustache is shaven off while another crew is busy descending the frontal protection screen of J-ello so that Baguette will have a better view of the Two Conical Front Bulge Containers so typical of the J-ello model.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>But will it work?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Will it work?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Something is happening?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Yes indeed the Tanking Station J-ello is now sending out the programmed recognition signals, oh I am so tense, will it all go according to plans, let us listen, yes, can you made it louder, yes, here we have it << please do not apologize, I find your accent so cute, I see that you hare a fan of my Team, are you sure that the stains have not got away and that you could stop rubbing my Conical Bulge Containers?>></B></div> <bR> <div> <B>This is fantastic viewers, everything is going according to plans, even better than planned.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Now only one program remains to be run and the docking will be the first historical refilling in hyper space of a J-ello Docking Station by an Old Europe Hunting Missile.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Control what are the news, can we listen?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Yes, everything is going as planned;</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Let us what a rerun of that phase</B></div> <bR> <div> <B><< Sorry my lady, I must have been distracted, I did not notice that I was still rubbing your External Conical Bulge containers with my Long Distance Sensors. Would you please let me come a bit nearer to have a full view appreciation of the damage the procedure could have caused? Yes you do? Yes, here I have a full view, no everything appears to be five on five, it so happens I know a little restaurant not far way from my flat, where they serve the most delicious raw snails enveloped in live oysters with a touch of garlic and the Patron is a friend of mine and he will offer us a bottle of his best wine coming from his own windward, may I suggest that we leave this True Authentic Home Made Genuine Full Taste Barbecue and move together to my friend's place, the night is long and who knows what we can think of thereafter?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Oh sorry, I am retracting my external sensors from your External Conical Bulge Shaped Containers, most sorry, there is a slight hitch in the programme, probably best if we try it a bit later again, one must always be sure that the equipment is fully functional, don't you agree.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Fantastic, a Total Success!!! The docking is a full Total Genuine Home Made Flag Wrapped Success.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Viewers, Ed, Donky, hello, Ed, Donky, what do you mean, they are not there, they want to go and see if there could be some programming error in the sub routine retracting the Long Sensors from the Conical External Bulge Containers? There devotion to duty will never cease to astonish me.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Old Mate Rummy, are you coming with Me? No you want to continue to stand there? Sorry, I did bnot know you could not bend. My apologies, Old Mate Rummy.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Well, world viewers you have watched the first encounter between an Old Europe Baguette Hunter Missile and the Best Home Made Most Praised Docking Station. A full success, and, well, I wanted to keep this to the end of the program, please grab your credit cards, I have a fantastic information for you that Old Mate Rummy had authorized me to divulge, yes indeed, you have already guessed, the Program and Sub-routine making a docking possible between to different totally incompatible species, will be made available for free to all Viewers in the World, yes indeed fully free for the purchase of two hundred barrels of the Wasp Shaped Bubbly Refreshing Genuine Home Made Authentic liquid and the coupons for only and only one hundred visits to the Home Made Genuine Texan Authentic Contamination Free Barbecue meals if you take the De-Luxe with Big Side Order Model</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>All for free, viewers, you will be able to dock anywhere, anytime with anybody!</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Good night(ssssss) viewers!</B></div> </td> </tr></table></body>