Love

<body topmargin=0 leftmargin=0 marginheight=0 marginwidth=0> <table cellpadding=0 cellspacing=0 border=0 height="100%"><tr> <td valign="top" width=200 BGCOLOR="#99FFFF" TEXT="#F7F7FF"> <bR> </td> <td valign="top" width="100%" BGCOLOR="#33CCFF" TEXT="#080000"> <div> <B>Love</B></div> <bR> <bR> <div> <A HREF="index.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="The Glubs and the Noodles">The Glubs and the Noodles</A></div> <bR> <div> <A HREF="carnivorous.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Carnivorous">Carnivorous</A>   |   <A HREF="if_only_.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="If Only !">If Only !</A>   |   <A HREF="dont_worry.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Dont Worry">Don't Worry</A>   |   <A HREF="trust_me_.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Trust Me !">Trust Me !</A>   |   <A HREF="welcome.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Welcome">Welcome</A>   |   <A HREF="alfred_e_neuman.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Alfred E. Neuman">Alfred E. Neuman</A>   |   <A HREF="parlez_vous_français.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Parlezvous Français?">Parlez-vous Français?</A>   |   <A HREF="the_president.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="The President">The President</A>   |   <B>Love</B>   |   <A HREF="happy_end.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Happy End">Happy End</A>   |   <A HREF="darwins_noodles.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Darwins Noodles">Darwin's Noodles</A>   |   <A HREF="noodle_sex.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Noodle Sex">Noodle Sex</A>   |   <A HREF="archeology.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Archeology">Archeology</A></div> <bR> <bR> <div> <B>Monday, February 18, 2008</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Do you readers have the recipe for what one is supposed to do when Humanity is going to be evening meal of ferocious NOODLES!</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>They were all gathered in the Safety Room and waiting.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>J Edgar was getting more and more shifty and nervous, which irritated the President.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>“What is wrong with the Man, can't anybody give him a Kongrrress Puzzle” to solve so that he keeps out of our legs”.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>With respect M. President this is not quite the right problem. You see M. President, each day J. Edgar watches the 63</B><B>rd</B><B> rerun of “Dallas”. It appears he is in love with Pamela and is desperately waiting as his wife as told him that there is a sequence where Pamela takes a swim in the Ewing swimming pool in spite of the fact that she has forgotten her swimming suite.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Sorry M. President, your mouth is drooling, I am sorry to say that there was such a sequence but your predecessor had it cut out for his own private library.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>“His own private library?”</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Yes M. President.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>“And where did he keep this private library of his, at home?”</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>M. President, you know your predecessor who had to hide to have a drink because of his wife, would you have kept that reel in your home?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>“So where is it?”</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>In the Oval Room M. President, it is the base of the Statue of Liberty reproduction you received from the, well I do not dare say the word, you know it starts with an “F” and they eat frogs.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>“In the base of the Statue of Liberty and you say Pamela had forgotten her swimming suite, not even a red body?”</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Yes M. President</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>“And there is no way my wife can get into the Safe room?”</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>No M. President</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>“So what are you waiting for you triple idiot, go and get that recording and put it for us to look at.”</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>But M. President, that means that I would have to leave the Safe Room.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>“How long do you think you would be safe if you do not carry out my orders?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>The President was a man of decisions, however grave they were. But He was not afraid to show his humanity and humility.”</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>You know, well you won't believe it, but I have never been able to beat J. Edgar at that computer game “Kongrrress”; Incredible is it not?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>J. Edgar claims that the purpose is to shot down as many Republicans you can until you have the majority, my policy is</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>“Shot them down”</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>“And count afterwards”</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>And you know, these computer game creators are really on a reality trip. In the last version I nearly died laughing, they had imagined that the Chaiman of the Kongrrress would be a woman”. Next time the President will be a W O M A N !!!!!!!!!!</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>That game, J. Edgar won in 3 seconds.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>J. Edgar was sniffing here and there. He had turned on the count down computer for the Release of the atomic weapon but soon tired of listening to that voice which appeared to have no other objective but to inform him of the time.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>J. Edgar remembered all the happy days they had spent in the Safe Room, the day they had nuclearized Greenland as they refused to have a Disney Land installed. That had really been great fun and when they had nothing new to play with they used to rerun the video.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>How ever happy that day had been, he could still lick his lips when remembering the day the president had had a shouting match with his wife and decided that as from now the US would be again segregated, all women being north of a line going from Chicago to Seattle and the happy hours ensuing the issuance of that order. Until the President's wife came back and explained in carefully measured words and soft tone the reality of life. The safe bunker was so damaged that it had to be reconstructed.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>It was from this day the President started wearing a hearing aid that he cold turn on and off. Nobody had yet told him that it needed a battery.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>A pity really.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Apparently something was going on around the full size tri dimensional Screen, if he was lucky possibly he could see again the Little House in the Prairie? There were some parts he could not quite grasp yet, who was that man?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>But wait?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>No that is not possible.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>That music!</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Those derricks!</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>That Ranch!</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>That swimming pool!</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Like a snake attracted by the delicious aroma of an apple computer, the chief Intelligence was oozing his way nearer and nearer the screen.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>It could not be possible, was this the day all his dreams would be fulfilled?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>He might not recognize his wife in a crowd of three women (even if he has worked out that she must be one of them) but Pamela, beloved Pamela, adored Pamela, so much brains, so much wisdom, so much, (shit, he was not supposed to say the words that came to his lips and more).</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>The safety room had become totally quite, they could already see a leg  that could only be a Pamela leg, and as far as they could guess that leg was not the support of some garment that would hide the total splendor of the Goddess;</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>One could hear the saliva drops falling on the venerable floor of the White House Safety room and voices were being heard to hush J. Edgar away from the screen as they could not se anything anymore.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Anymore indeed.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Never would the Goddess Pamela be see, something appeared to happen, J. Edgar was kind of sucked into the screen (and no witty comments please and yes I know that it reminds you of Stargate, what do you think the White House Communication Officer was writing while they were waiting for NOODLES!!!.) </B></div> <bR> <div> <B>No more J. Edgar. </B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Only a pool, without even a Pamela leg.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>They were frozen.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Nothing</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Nothing.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Nothing?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Oh no, you fools, all were not frozen, all were not males, Sarah was there with her children.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Sarah turned to the only person that seemed to have kept his cool and lucidity, the Army Commander. Some would later one say that he would not be affected as he had made a vow to totally disregard anything that was a male soldier. Anyway who was Pamela?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>General, can this television be adjusted to any spot on Earth?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>My dear lady, do you think you are in the Soviet Union </B></div> <bR> <div> <B>(sorry General, there is no more Soviet Union since twenty years)</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>How do you want me to defend the US if I cannot even be properly briefed by my own Intelligent Service.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Of course soldier, I mean, my lady, no offense meant, no your fault that you are built all twisted and unusable. Of course the Confederating can </B></div> <bR> <div> <B>(General, the Civil war has been over for more than a hundred years)</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Civil War? You mean the War of Independence? And who won?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>They??????????? Won!</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>You are pulling my leg.!!!</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Could you stop pulling at my uniform you woman. You claim we were discussing something; impossible, this would be classified. What is a civilian doing in our Safe Room.?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Whether we could aim the television at any spot? Of course we can!</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>You want us to aim at the spot where you husband is surrounded by the horrible NOODLES!!!!</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Why?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Because you love him?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Computer, translation immediately, I do hate these coded messages. What is the code for “love”.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>The computer has burned out?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Anybody can help, what is the coding of “Love””</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>It is like wanting to have four stars when you have three stars? Why should you not say so immediately woman. I why should you get four stars? You do not want four stars.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Could some one bring me some of the President's Bourbon, this conversation is worse than the one I had with the President of the Soviet Union when he refused to surrender Moscow to us.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Look, M'am, I do not understand a word of what you are saying, but please get her off my uniform and if she wants to go and get four stars from her husband, do please aim at the spot and let her be transferred;</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Sarah moved towards the TV screen, it was a bit blurry but soon she could distinguish Alan sitting all alone, looking at a picture of her and the children.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>There was a kind of typhoon and suddenly she was with him.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Alan was there and she was so ashamed, she has not brushed her hair, nor cleaned her mouth and she was wearing that dress he never liked even if he never said anything about it.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>They looked at one another.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>It must have been so strange for Alan, yet he did not seem a bit surprise. He looked at her, she so much wanted to run into his arms, but she was frozen on the spot, her body was as if it was no longer her body.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Alan came nearer and nearer to her, a warm smile was growing, he stopped at arm length, he lifted his arm and put his hand on her left shoulder.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Sarah was so ashamed, Alan is going to notice that I stink, that I have not changed my clothes for three days, and she felt so stupid, the only thing she cold really thing about was whether they would have changed the setting of the TVgate or whether they were all watching Alan and Her.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Alan moved his hand so slowly along her throat, now his fingers were just touching her ear lobe and now Sarah did not bother anymore about her clothes, her smell, that they could all be watching them all over the Earth, she could think only one word</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Alan!</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>And yet she could not move a limb.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Sarah was so afraid, was Alan going to think that she was rejecting him?</B></div> <bR> <bR> <bR> <bR> </td> </tr></table></body>