Moulin rouge

<body topmargin=0 leftmargin=0 marginheight=0 marginwidth=0> <table cellpadding=0 cellspacing=0 border=0 height="100%"><tr> <td valign="top" width=200 BGCOLOR="#99FFFF" TEXT="#F7F7FF"> <bR> </td> <td valign="top" width="100%" BGCOLOR="#33CCFF" TEXT="#080000"> <div> <B>Moulin rouge</B></div> <bR> <bR> <div> <A HREF="id17.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Contact Me">Contact Me</A>   |   <A HREF="glubs.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Glubs">Glubs</A>   |   <A HREF="ethology.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Ethology">Ethology</A>   |   <A HREF="shapes.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Shapes">Shapes</A>   |   <A HREF="foreword.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Foreword">Foreword</A>   |   <A HREF="bye_bye_my_lovely.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Bye Bye my Lovely">Bye Bye my Lovely</A>   |   <A HREF="hpm.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="H.P.M.">H.P.M.</A>   |   <A HREF="black_hole.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Black Hole">Black Hole</A>   |   <A HREF="boss.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Boss">Boss</A>   |   <A HREF="gray_or_grey.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Gray or Grey">Gray or Grey</A>   |   <A HREF="two_bulges.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Two Bulges">Two Bulges</A>   |   <A HREF="down_bulge.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Down Bulge">Down Bulge</A>   |   <A HREF="petri.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Petri">Petri</A>   |   <A HREF="middle_word.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Middle Word">Middle Word</A>   |   <A HREF="death.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Death">Death</A>   |   <A HREF="2d_3d.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="2D, 3D,">2D, 3D,</A>   |   <A HREF="virtual_world.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Virtual World">Virtual World</A>   |   <A HREF="freud.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Freud">Freud</A>   |   <A HREF="segregation.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Segregation">Segregation</A>   |   <A HREF="sickness.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Sickness">Sickness</A>   |   <A HREF="uterus.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Uterus">Uterus</A>   |   <A HREF="getting_high.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Getting High">Getting High</A>   |   <A HREF="end.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="End">End</A>   |   <A HREF="light.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Light">Light</A>   |   <A HREF="back_word.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Back Word">Back Word</A>   |   <A HREF="music.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Music">Music</A>   |   <A HREF="food.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Food">Food</A>   |   <A HREF="id44.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Commercial">Commercial</A>   |   <A HREF="talk.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Talk">Talk</A>   |   <A HREF="void.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Void">Void</A>   |   <A HREF="words.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Words">Words</A>   |   <B>Moulin rouge</B>   |   <A HREF="now.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Now!!!">Now!!!</A>   |   <A HREF="happiness.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Happiness">Happiness</A>   |   <A HREF="love.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Love">Love</A>   |   <A HREF="hat.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="H.A.T.">H.A.T.</A>   |   <A HREF="day_one.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Day One">Day One</A>   |   <A HREF="time.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Time">Time</A>   |   <A HREF="look_.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Look !!!">Look !!!</A>   |   <A HREF="inflate_yourself.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Inflate Yourself">Inflate Yourself</A>   |   <A HREF="hollow_mass_matrix.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Hollow Mass Matrix">Hollow Mass Matrix</A>   |   <A HREF="civl_war.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Civl War">Civl War</A>   |   <A HREF="some_like_it_hot.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Some like it hot">Some like it hot</A>   |   <A HREF="pro_or_anti_zac.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Pro or anti Zac?">Pro or anti Zac?</A>   |   <A HREF="psychology.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Psychology">Psychology</A>   |   <A HREF="dictionary.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Dictionary">Dictionary</A>   |   <A HREF="after.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="After">After</A>   |   <A HREF="i_am_i_am.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="I am, I am">I am, I am</A>   |   <A HREF="noise_music_baseball.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Noise Music Baseball">Noise Music Baseball</A>   |   <A HREF="we_are_a_dream.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="We are a dream">We are a dream</A>   |   <A HREF="navigation.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Navigation">Navigation</A></div> <bR> <bR> <div> <B>Paris, March 10th, 2005</B></div> <bR> <DIV ALIGN="LEFT"></DIV> <div> <TABLE BORDER="0" CELLPADDING="1" CELLSPACING="1" WIDTH="418" BORDERCOLORLIGHT="#C0C0C0" BORDERCOLORDARK="#808080" FRAME="BOX" RULES="ALL" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0" > <tR> <tD VALIGN=TOP BGCOLOR=#FFFF99 HEIGHT= 323 WIDTH="414"><div> <B>One of these days, gray, foggy,  I don't know who felt that it was worth producing it</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Except the total Helzappoppinesk French way of life; when the Evaluation Mission of the Olympics Committee comes for a three days visit, the Workers(?) go on strike; No trains, no airplanes. </B></div> <bR> <div> <B>The objective of the strike: to warn that they would go on strike if they were not listened to. And the strikers carry a baseball cap saying “yes to Paris Olympics”. Don't try to understand, you could never understand.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>It is like the French who sell their land and houses to foreign investors and then join a local Organization fighting against the invasion of foreigners. We are in France;</B></div> <bR> </tD> </tR> </TABLE></div> <bR> <bR> <div> <B>Good Morning Glub Professors</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Indeed I have been forced to tighten security, I regret to say that two Professors claiming to be Glubs from the CandA and the FbeeEye University have been caught trying to steal the formula for producing Human Embryos. Had it not be for the anonymous letter on the paper head of the CandA denouncing the FbeeEye and the phone call from the FbeeEye, they might have got away with it. It is still a mystery to us why instead of stealing the formula they stole the weekly list for coffee list and my private files about Glub Bubbles.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>So, regrettably Glub Professors, a few seats will remain vacant, which you realize will mean that your contribution will have to be increased to compensate for the defectors.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>To avoid further occurrences of such flagrant breaches of security, it has been decided by the Highest Chairman of the Security Board</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>What do you mean, who is the Chairman, I am of course !!!</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>You would not happen to be another one of those slimy FbeeEye Agents polluting my courses?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>No, you are not, you are from Macy's Rebate University?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>OK, that sounds good enough for the time being.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>So as Chairman, The Committee has decided to Implement the Freedom Act, you will therefore, all be accompanied by one of my Glub Bubble Student, the Catalogue being a your disposal at the entrance for a very reasonable fee considering the quality of the photos and the storage fees we have had for all these textile Protection Fields my dear Glub bubbles had to take off for the purpose of Security.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Once you have selected your companion, incidentally Blond Glub Bubble with the fawn like Eyes has been selected to attend to my security, once you have selected you Security Officer, you are requested to take your seat.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>If you wish your companion to sit on your knee pods and embrace you with Her Ten Bubble tentacles, the fee is ten units, should you instead wish to sit on your companion, the fee will be adapted to a level commensurate with your corpulence.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>So let us all proceed with these tedious financial procedures requested by the Security Committee, should you wish to contribute directly to my Bahamas Bank Account, Blond Bubble Glub can give you all the appropriate instructions.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Glub Professors, due to my huge sense of Responsibility to the Community of Science of which we are all but humble Servants, even if some servants happen to me more Important than others, also totally putting aside any commercial aspects which could only pollute the straight path of Scientific Progress</B></div> <bR> <div> <B><<Yes, Blond Glub Bubble, does my account end with 006, yes, that's it and do not hesitate if you have any doubt>></B></div> <bR> <div> <B>As I was saying, disregarding all commercial polluting aspects, my University,</B></div> <bR> <div> <B><< what do you mean again, who is the Chairman, I am of course, and I am also the Chief Accountant >></B></div> <bR> <div> <B>My University has decided to disclose the formula for the Production of the Mark II Human Embryos.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B><< You again, you want to know which Mark level we are at now, as if you did not know that we are at “Mark My Word Version LongLeg”>></B></div> <bR> <div> <B>As I was saying before being rudely interrupted, we are going to release, for strictly personal Use and only for one Petri Dish per participant and for a trial period of 2 weeks, totally free of cost</B></div> <bR> <div> <B><< you again, what do you cant. How long it takes to breed a set of Human Embryos, six months of course, you  Linux!!!>></B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Assistants bring in the first batch of Embryo Produced Humans</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Glub Professors, you see in front of you the first batch of Embryo Produced Humans. Would they have been produced in one of your laboratories, it would have been a huge success for your University, but you must understand that such a product was just deemed to be a failure at our level.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Yes, you wonder what substrate we used to grow these embryos.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>At that stage we considered that all essential needs had to be satisfied. We therefore gave them ample quantities of milk and Coke Powder, Liberty Fried Spring Rolled Newspapers, Rapp Soup which we carefully poured through the ear opening until it came out though the nose, indicating an optimum level.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>They grew up quite well but as we say in Scientific Circles they were a very unsteady batch, the more they grew up, the more coke they demanded, and they were all the time holding long speeches about revolution and breaking down the system.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>We tried to stabilize the substrate and injected a big dose of elections, the results were very disappointing. Each one of them appeared to believe that he was to vote for himself and bashed the others if they did not vote for him</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Finally we decided that there was nothing we could do with this batch, we gave them guitars, microphones, drums, and as you can see they appear to be quite happy now, shouting and rolling on the floor, but it was a scientific dead end, who could stand the stench for long?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Assistants, you can record that batch and bring in our next set.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Yes, I can hear a murmur of admiration coming from you Glub Professors, but I am beginning to wonder if the Security measures I have taken to ensure your safety were totally appropriate, I am astonished by the number of you who appear to have undertaken to give private lectures to my Glub Bubble Students and really, that Professors at your age should still be interested in investigation the liquid upper bulge containers, that is beyond my understanding, I can guaranty that you will find all necessary facts about Upper Bulges if you read my publications.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Assistants, bring in the second batch.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>They look nice, don't they?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>I can see from your look that we have succeeded, that is a batch of perfect Humans, don't you? </B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Do not be ashamed in believing that, I, the Glub Professor, thought that I had succeeded where all of you had failed.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>The substrate on which we grew this batch of humans was made of 90% of dollars. Each day they got at nine o'clock a dose of  Nikkei and each evening a dose of Dow Jones. In fact they became so addicted that they could not life without it. During the day they were allowed free access to the FT, we thought that it would not harm them as it did not contain anything.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>So you wonder, what is the problem, apparently we have perfectly healthy Humans?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Glub Professors, they do not reproduce at all, they have apparently totally lost any interest in bulges except for those on the trading curves.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Assistants, kindly give the Humans the latest news about the Oil index, the total deficit, the unemployment rate, and the pollution index. See, Glub Professors, now these Humans are totally deflated they just wander aimlessly. Regretfully, we even have to make sure that they do not get near any window at the upper levels as they appear to have been so uplifted by the news that they believe that they can fly.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Yes, Glub Professors, you, you would have given up at this stage, obviously we were confronted with a problem that could not be solved.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>But, and here I wish to acknowledge Red Haired Glub Bubble Student who so kindly assisted me while I was doing all these tedious calculations about the Upper Bulges of the Humans, you will understand that these exercises were very boring and exhausting especially as the experiments had to be repeated again and again in all possible positions. </B></div> <bR> <div> <B>I felt that it as appropriate that we do not devote all our time to these measurements of inflating and deflating objects, so occasionally we would have a rest and try the effect of liquids with amusing bubbles and fish grains which were both salty and sweet.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Then Red Haired Glub Bubble Student wanted to make a laugh and said:</B></div> <bR> <div> <B><< I am sure the Humans would not even survive one hour if they had to do this >></B></div> <bR> <div> <B>You Glub Professors would of course not have understood anything, but for me it was as if a light had gone up!</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Next morning in spite of my dizziness and a strange feeling that an iron band was trying to dislocate my head, I gave the instructions for a totally new substrate.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Assistants kindly bring in batch 66!!!</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Here, don't they look strange? I am sure you think that I am joking, that this must be a failure?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Not at all, it is a total success.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>What did I use as substrate?</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>You will never believe it.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>I replaced the dollars by a red liquid which is in many ways similar to the one with the bubbles, a liquid which was not on the market, that I had to produce in my NAPA laboratories. To keep the highest level of security I tasted myself each batch.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B><< what do you mean, obscene Professor in the first row who as managed to have two Glub Bubble Students caretaker instead of one, what do you mean asking whether my red nose would be a side effect of this liquid substrate? </B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Of course not, my very crystalline red nose is an amplification that gives me a greater sensibility to the qualities of the substrate and will you kindly stop interrupting me and go back to your Glub Bubble students >></B></div> <bR> <div> <B>They appeared to be faring quite well on this substrate, but looked a bit bored, so we gave them sticks we produced ourselves, which we called “baguette”. As the sticks did not keep their attention for long we produced another toy, a kind of round Frisbee made from the excrements of another living thing, we called it “camembert” to make sure that this ugly name would warn any technician not to touch it.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>I will admit to you, Professors that we bypassed the Federal Health Authorities Regulations and gave each Embryo a daily injection of the banned substance  L.O.V.E.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>A strange thing with this batch of Embryos is that they appeared to fare very badly as soon as they were in a surrounding with straight lines. We believe that this could possibly have been the first batch of Humans with a sense of dimensionality as they appeared to be interested only in Bulges and Curves.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>They had also a very strange genetic defect, they would get themselves into a rage if they heard anything in our beautiful English language, and would only be soothed if they could get near a cooing and furry doll that would emit these strange noises that they must use as some kind of communication tool.</B></div> <bR> <DIV ALIGN="LEFT"></DIV> <div> <B><IMG SRC="09a2c8d0.jpg" border=0 width="300" height="397" ALIGN="BOTTOM" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0"></B></div> <bR> <div> <TABLE BORDER="0" CELLPADDING="2" CELLSPACING="1" WIDTH="499" BORDERCOLORLIGHT="#C0C0C0" BORDERCOLORDARK="#808080" FRAME="BOX" RULES="ALL" HSPACE="0" VSPACE="0" > <tR> <tD VALIGN=TOP BGCOLOR=#FFFF99 HEIGHT= 566 WIDTH="493"><div> <B>Suddenly I realize that I have not expressed everything I owe to that genius, a man you most likely have never heard of, a  man who has changed the life of a whole generation of Frenchmen through his cartoons, </B><A HREF="http://www.marcelgotlib.com/" TARGET="_top" TITLE="http://www.marcelgotlib.com/"><B>Gotlib</B></A><B>.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>It would be an immense victory for me if you were to look on the Net for "Gotlib", but regretfully, it does not make any sense if you have not been brought up on French logic, but if you claim to understand the sentence</B></div> <bR> <div> <B><< we are going on strike to warn them that if they don't do what we yet don't know, we will go on strike>> then you are ripe for Gotlib (and France)</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Gotlib, like Rossini worked until he was forty something then he suddenly stopped all production.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>His line was to look at life and try and make us see how absurd and lovely it is.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>In many way, his drawings complement the analysis </B><A HREF="http://www.answers.com/topic/bruno-bettelheim" TARGET="_top" TITLE="http://www.answers.com/topic/bruno-bette"><B>Bettelheim </B></A><B>made of the significance of tales read to childs.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>And yes, I know, it is bad to praise Bettelheim, but I will continue to give him my love and admiration.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>I wish I had written the sentence:</B></div> <bR> <div> <B><<Love is not enough>></B></div> <bR> <bR> </tD> </tR> </TABLE></div> <bR> <div> <B>We were here on a total success, yet, I am not ashamed to admit in front of you, my friends, that there is still along way to go.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>You see, while the precedent batch was totally uninterested in mating, this batch seems to have one and only one interest, </B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Rubbing and Mating !!!</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>We are in our next experiment going to try and cross these two batches, but as yet, we have not had much success, they appear not to be able to cross mate.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>But I have added 40% of Bourbon to the substrate of both groups and have great expectations.</B></div> <bR> <div> <B>Assistants, could you kindly tell me where all the Professors and my dear Glub Bubble Student have vanished?</B></div> <bR> <bR> <bR> </td> </tr></table></body>